Does anyone still believe in happily ever after?

Did you know that 40% of children born in 2007 were to single parent families? Do Americans really think that a child doesn't benefit from having two parents living under the same roof? Has the high divorce rate of our parents and grandparents taught the younger generations that marriage is all make believe? 64% of women and 50% of men who marry before age 24 will divorce.

Does anyone still believe in happily ever after?

I was rather shocked by a conversation I overheard between my three sons regarding prenuptial agreements. I heard their own pessimism about marriage and how legal documents before the I do's seemed totally logical. My boys, whose parents have never experienced divorce and are still married after 28 years, obviously have reservations about the happily ever after, too.

What has happened in America to change the fabric regarding the roles of marriage, parenthood, and family?


While the 70's ushered in the right for women to end their pregnancies, abortions have steadily declined since the early 90's as women choose to have their babies. Newborn adoptions have become rare as women have no qualms about raising their children without the added bonus of a father and husband. While most people applaud the pro-choice decisions, this has contributed to the increase in single-parent numbers. What it doesn't explain is why there is so little commitment from the parents-to-be when it comes to nurturing their children together under the same roof. What is up with that?

Bringing up children is hard work! Looking back, I am thankful my husband and I chose marriage and stayed committed to one another as we reared our children. While I hope our children will one day appreciate their one family unit, we didn't get married only because we wanted to have children and we haven't stayed married just for their benefit either. The same logic must apply for single parents today.

The upcoming birth of a child is obviously no longer a reason to marry. Is this a good thing?

Besides reasons like love and respect, I wish I could tell you what the magic formula has been for us. I asked my husband to give me one word to answer this very question and his response was "tolerate!" Well, he did chuckle when he said it! There are times where tolerance is part of the equation! While I cannot pinpoint one particular trait, I think one crucial element has been that Steve and I generally like one another. Just like in the movie, "When Harry met Sally," there is something to be said for sharing a healthy friendship with your spouse, too. With a healthy dose of friendship, love, respect, loyalty, selfless giving, and yes, even tolerance, flows much easier.

The good news is that the divorce rate has begun decreasing, particularly among those who wait until after age 24 to marry. I believe that marriages can last until "death do us part." I believe that children benefit from having a two-parent home and that marriage should come first.

OK..so I believe in the fairy tale! Doesn't everyone love a happy ending?